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Posts Tagged ‘awkwardness’

  1. If Only I Could Morph Into A Puddle

    March 30, 2012 by Kristi Knight

    Blake and I have a good friend who always asks the same three questions upon meeting new people:

    1. What is your favorite literary device? 
      • Onomatopoeia, of course. It’s the number one most fun literary device! – Kristi
      • Anthropomorphism, of course. I do not feel like I need to sell talking animals to you. – Blake
    2. What is your favorite slang term for money? 
      • Cheddah. I love cheese. I also have a hard time pronouncing “r”s. Cheddah is the perfect mix of both those things! – Kristi
      • Duckets. I need street cred. – Blake
    3. If you could have any super-hero power, what would it be? 


    This last one gets the most thought. Usually, people respond with some obvious and mundane super-hero power like “flying” or “being invisible” or “ability to move things with your mind.” These, the common and mostly boring powers represented in the majority of comic books and super-hero movies, are things that “normal” people would consider the most vital and/or fun of all other possible powers.

    NOT ME! I have long claimed that the number one super-hero power to have is the ability to morph into a puddle at any moment and therefore be able to escape a NUMBER of super awkward situations. Obviously, this was inspired by a childhood mainlining “The Secret World of Alex Mack” combined with the enviable talent for turning any situations into a absolute party of uncomfortableness.

    Do you know how many times I have said said something “humorous” (quotes around the humorous, of course), only to receive a response of nervous laughter?  PUDDLE!  Or when I start talking and JUST CAN’T STOP (happens all the time) – PUDDLE TIME!  I would use this ability CONSTANTLY!  In fact, sometimes when I am stuck in a conversation and I feel my heart rate accelerating and my entire body breaking out into a terrible sweat, I EVEN SAY OUT LOUD, “You know what I wish? I wish I could turn into a metallic puddle and puddle my way out of here right now.”  Totally improves the awkwardness of the situation (NO.  NO IT DOES NOT.)

    On a side note – I commented to Blake during Sunday night’s Mad Men episode, that I guaranteed that every person in the room during Megan’s absolutely CRINGE-WORTHY burlesque performance in front of the entire birthday party just WISHED they had the ability to turn into metallic puddles and puddle away NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT THAT REAL LIFE ALEX MACK WAS ACTUALLY IN THAT SCENE!  And not even in puddle form!  The grown up actress who played Alex Mack was actually in that exact Mad Men scene.  My mind?  Definitely blown.

    Enjoy some clips of old Alex herself, escaping awkward situations all over the place (also, using her power for other reasons, but you know.  The puddle ability is BY FAR the best.)

    And, here she is, all grown up….wishing she could turn into a puddle and escape the stifling awkwardness that is Don and Megan Draper

    "I want to turn into a puddle so badly!" - Alex Mack