So THAT’S Why You Are Supposed To Be Careful Mixing Hot Liquids In A Blender

So, as I continue to plod my way through my very own Julie and Julia and Kristi cooking project, I settled on the next recipe from Mastering The Art of French Cooking – Potato and Leek Soup.  After the adventure that was Coq Au Vin, I decided to try something a little easier.  This recipe had all of about 5 ingredients, potatoes, leeks, water, salt, and cream – therefore, it had to be easy.

And it was.  Except for one little detail.  You see, I guess they didn’t have blenders back in the 1950s, because Julia instructed me to simply use a fork to mash the tender vegetables together after they hung out in a pot of simmering water for what seemed like eternity to hungry old me.  If that didn’t work, I could, as a last resort, rely on a food mill.  Well, I’m not entirely sure what a food mill is, and after half-halfheartedly chasing the leeks and potatoes around the giant stew pot with a tiny fork for a while, I decided that blenders hadn’t been invented during Julia’s time, and pulled out the trusty blender.

As I plugged everything in and poured as much of the pot into the blender as it could possibly contain, I vaguely recalled warnings from a previous corn chowder recipe regarding the risks of steam when blending hot liquids.  Being entirely to lazy to actually find any sort of instructions, I decide that I needed to allow some of the steam to release by not securely fastening the lid onto the blender and allowed the lid to crack open at the side.  Then I turned it on.

Potatoes and leeks exploded out of the top of the blender over my entire kitchen.  While my naturally good-natured husband laughed at the predicament, I immediately began yelling that the soup was RUINING MY COOKBOOK!!  I frantically blotted the cookbook, while Blake doubled over and laughter and the dogs began enjoying the people-food heaven they had found themselves thrust into – licking everything in sight.

I eventually laughed as well, and Blake and I poured the remaining soup back into the stew pot.  Deciding that the mistake was leaving the blender’s top cracked open, we re-poured the liquid into the blender and this time, securely fastened the top in place.  We went as far as to hold the top down.  Once again, I turned the blender on.

AND AGAIN MOLTEN HOT POTATOES AND LEEKS AND WATER EXPLODED ACROSS MY KITCHEN.

This time I was also able to see the hilarity in the situation (especially now that my cookbook was safely drying in the living room).  The dogs resumed licking the floor, and Blake and I resumed laughing hysterically.  I came to the conclusion that I should probably look up instructions on the blending of hot liquids in a blender.

After a short internet search, I discovered that you are supposed to puree hot soups in the kitchen in small batches with a slight crack in the seal in the top as to allow the steam to escape and the liquid to expand.  Information in hand, we careful tried a fourth of a cup worth of soup to see if we would once again find ourselves covered in onion-y soup.

And no soup coat!  We succeeded!  Tiny cup by tiny cup, we pureed the mixture.

We ended up with some delicious soup and gigantic mess (later cleaned by Blake, what a guy.)

Beeping, Snoring, and Sleep Theft

After having a weird dream in which I was receiving emergency leg transplants that just happened to be identical to my 8 pound dog’s legs (that’s right, I was going to have tiny yorkie legs), I was woken up this morning to a soft, “beep, beep, beep.”  I sleepily opened my eyes, surveyed the room and immediately fell back asleep.  About 15 seconds later I heard another, “beep, beep, beep.”  I opened my eyes again, turned over and noticed it was 6:00 in the morning and fell back asleep.  Fifteen more seconds pass and three more beeps wake me.  This time I wake up to Porky standing on my head staring down at me.  I swear, she mouthed the words, “Make it stop!”  At this point, I am awake long enough to hear another beeping interlude coming from Blake’s side of the bed. Further investigation reveals that the beeping is a result of his blood sugar monitor, alerting him that he has ventured too far away from it during his sleep.  Blake, of course, king of sleeping and snoring, has not even remotely heard any of the beeping alarm situated one foot from his face.  I grab his arm, probably a little roughly, and say, “Blake, your blood sugar monitor is beeping at you.”  I lay in the dark, listening as Blake types a few commands into his monitor, and promptly falls back asleep, snoring loudly.

At this point, I am wide awake, lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, as Blake slowly breathes in less and less air as his snoring becomes louder and louder, culminating in a long silence then gasp for air.  Sleep apnea at its finest.  I stare over at Porky, who is staring back at me and willing me to smother Blake with a pillow.  That little dog is murderous. Luckily for Blake, I do not share Porky’s murderous intentions, and I simply turn to face the clock and watch as it slowly counts down to 6:30 then 6:45, and finally 7:10, when my alarm goes off.

I let it loudly buzz until Blake stops snoring, and then satisfied that his sleep was interrupted, I snooze it and try vainly to sleep for an additional 10 minutes.  However, seeing as how I cannot fall asleep in the 2 second window between Blake’s silence and his snoring, the loud noises emanating from the lump next to me keep me from falling back asleep. 7:20 comes, and the alarm again wakes him up.  This time, I am furious!  Porky is also furious!  (Chopper, is in Blake’s camp, with the ability to sleep through pretty much everything on the planet except for maybe if you picked him up and threw him across the room.  That MIGHT wake him.) I throw the covers off of me and stomp to the bathroom, exclaiming, “Blake!  Your snoring and beeping robbed me of an extra 1.5 hours of sleep!  Next time I am going to send you to the couch!”

Blake looks up at me, all innocence and sleepiness, glances at the Chopper, blissfully sleeping next to him, closes his eyes again and within 3 seconds continues with his snoring.

Where I Reveal The Fact That I Am A Bad Person

A couple of Saturdays ago, Blake and I returned back to our apartment after an exciting night on the town (which was ending at the grand hour of 9:30.  We are getting old).   We walked loudly to our elevator while we sang some random song (normal, for us) when we both heard banging.  We both froze and stared at each other.  We heard more banging and then the elevator alarm.

This is where Blake and I discovered our inner-evilness.

Seemingly at the same time, Blake and I came to the conclusion that there was someone trapped in the elevator and also that any sort of “help” would involve us spending some of our precious time waiting for the fire department and answering any questions they might have.  Neither one of us said one word as Blake mouthed, “What should we do?”  On the same wave length, I mouthed back to him, “I don’t know.  Should we call the fire department?  Or should we walk quietly the other way.”  We both laughed (silently, as not to alert the trapped people in the elevator of our presence), and dared one another to be the first person to walk away.

The people in the elevator continued yelling, “Hey!  We are trapped in here!  We don’t have our cell phones!  Can you help us?”

Finally, after too long of a pause, I sighed, said a mental good-bye to the episodes of Freaks and Geeks I was about to enjoy and responded, “Yeah, we are down here.  Would you like us to call the fire department?”

FAS: Andrew Greer

Continuing my “Best of Affiliates” series, which is featuring a few of the amazing musicians I have had the pleasure to play with that have recently released albums, including MK & The Gentlemen, Amy Stroup, Katie Warren, Manic Bloom, Andrew Greer, and Paul Banks & The Carousels, we hit upon the Nashville super-one-man-group Andrew Greer.

ANDREW GREER

Nashville artist Andrew Greer will make you think. Nashville artist Andrew Greer will also make you forget.

With his most recent release, Open Book, this Azle, TX native brings in a feeling of nostalgic wonder and has really come into a great sound all his own. Andrew finds the perfect balance with hints of country, pop, contemporary and indie stylings that keeps you on your toes and provides a thoroughly enjoyable music listening experience.

Teaming with such heralded artists as Ginny Owens and a plethora of successful Nashville musicians backing him, Andrew’s natural composing talents really shine. He seems to always find the common thread that ties all people together, be it through his writing, composing, producing, or interviewing. No matter what the medium, Andrew’s true talent is making people feel comfortable and at peace. He comes from a place of selflessness, servitude, creativity and confidence, all of which are shown throughout the album.

I first crossed paths with Andrew after my sophomore year of college when a good friend (and former band-mate) (and crazy talented person), Julee Duwe – who produced Andrew’s GREAT music video, which you can see below – called me up asking if I wanted to do a small summer tour playing bass with some classmates of hers from Nashville. I jumped at the opportunity and soon found myself cramped in a silver Durango pulling a U-Haul across 5 states, practicing every morning and playing most nights. It was a great time in my life and one that I am very thankful for having. It was the only time that I have been what would be considered a “full-time musician” on the road.

The next summer I landed an internship up in Nashville at EMI records and Andrew and I shared an apartment. He almost killed me one time. And I introduced him to tequilla shots. We were bosom buddies.

He frequents Texas and Nashville concert halls and if you have a chance definitely look him up.

• Buy “Open Book” on iTunes
• Visit his official website
• Follow Andrew on Twitter

“Learning To Live” by Andrew Greer

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

“Emmylou” by Andrew Greer

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

“Gone Are The Days” by Andrew Greer – Music video produced by Julee Duwe

GONE ARE THE DAYS Official Music Video from Andrew Greer on Vimeo.

Cheers,